Wednesday, August 23, 2006

Unsolicited advice

It is unnecessary and annoying. I know that friends mostly mean well when they blurt out what (they think) you're doing wrong and/or why what they (think they) know is better than what you do. But, my goodness, it is so frustrating.

It's one thing if a friend is putting herself in a dangerous situation. Because then, as a true friend, you need to let her know that you're worried for her and are here for her if she needs you. (Or him, if it's a guy of course.)

But otherwise, just keep your mouth shut. Please :)

This is something that has always bothered me, but recently it's been stemming from the fact that I am going to, in the next half year, be making some major changes in my life. Changes that are going to make me a lot happier and more inline with the future that I want. And my mind's made up. 100%. I know that the choices that I'm going to make are the right ones for me.

And all I want is support, which mostly I've been given... But there are a few friends who've felt the need to tell me what they'd do if they in my shoes. I appreciate the fact that their words stem from love for me and wanting to help me, but 1) I'm not asking for their help and 2) they are NOT in my shoes. Yes, there are many different ways to do things, I understand that. But the way that I choose is the way that suits me best. And because you're NOT in my shoes, you can't really tell me that I'm wrong.

Unless, as I said before, the situation is a dangerous one, I really try to curtail anything unsolicited from coming out of my mouth... Because I think that people should be able to hope and dream and really reach for their goals - without my opinion bringing them down... Unless they ask for my thoughts, in which case I am always honest. OK, maybe I do express my views on the blog... but that's different :) I just wish that everyone would adopt the same policy. Don't give your opinion if it's not asked for! Because if it's not asked for, it's most likely not wanted.

Anyway - I'm off to ballet... PEACE

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At 11:44 PM, Blogger Asian Mistress said...

F*ck the haters!

At 10:15 AM, Blogger I-66 said...

Yeah... If I want advice I will most certainly ask for it. People ought to be able to see the difference between "should I do this?" and "I'm going to do this"

At 7:26 AM, Blogger Daniel said...

Well, if you want my advice... hatdly more sense in expecting others not to give advice than them expecting you to take it.


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